dessert

Life is sticky, just like caramel.

~ Laura ~ Leave a comment

You can hear the crumble. Bit by bit, piece by piece. The sound echoing within the empty walls … the hollow finally showing it’s depth. During the day it is drowned out by the background noise of daily life. At night, alone in the dark, with nothing but your muffling sobs to drowned it out, the familiar shattering ensues.
It is one thing in life to know something. It is quite another to say it out loud. What makes it truly unbearable and downright full of shame and embarrassment is someone else saying it out loud. This is not the validation you want. This is not what you want to be recognized for or have attention drawn to. Yes, you know it. How can you not? You can “not” by ignoring it and acting as though it doesn’t exist. You have perfected the toddler mentality of if you can’t see it then neither can they. You know this isn’t true, but you still let yourself believe it. You have to in order to make it through. You tell yourself it isn’t that bad. That you can change it if you want to. It will be different this time. This is what has and always will define you, because you let it. Is it comfortable? No. Is it healthy? Hell no, and on so many levels. You know all of this … So does that make it worse? Does it make it worse to be an adult, know you have an issue and with a sound mind refuse to acknowledge it? Or is that the definition of scared? Maybe it is a fine line we walk between scared shitless and ignorance is bliss.
They say knowledge is power, so why after someone else tells you what you have known deep down in that hollow space, that you feel powerless and at your must vulnerable and/or shameful. How did you let it get this far. How did it domino so fast? Maybe you have to be so low you are forced to work up. Maybe you need to be scared so shitless that there really is only one choice … to move forward and to stare into the face of what ails you and tell it to sit down and shut up. The choice is yours and yours alone.

Salted Caramel and Chocolate Ganache Brownies.

Brownies:
Grab your favorite box or recipe (I love Betty Crocker’s brownie recipe https://havesweetswillshare.com/2015/09/03/look-for-the-signs/). Make per the instructions and let cool.

IMG_0988Salted Caramel:
In a large sauce pan combined 1 can sweetened condenced milk and 3 bags of Werther’s Soft Caramels. Stir until all caramels are melted and it is smooth and bubbly. Add 1/4 tsp. fine sea salt and stir until it is distributed. Resisit licking the spoon … the caramel is scalding hot! Pour this mixture on top of your brownies and set in the fridge sans cover to firm up.

 

IMG_0958Chocolate Ganache:
Keep in mind chocolate ganache (recipe in previous post here) needs to set at room temp. for about 12 hours to become solid and non-melting at room temp. If you make the ganache and pour it immediately over the brownies it will set up in the fridge but become very soft at room temp. I suggest letting the brownie and caramel set in the fridge while the ganache sets at room temp. After 10-12 hours you can beat the ganache with an electric mixer, just to make it spreadable and then slather it on.

Everyone has 10 minutes!

~ Laura ~ Leave a comment

 imageTrifle. A retro hodge-podge of goodness. Think of it as an “everything but the kitchen sink” kind of dessert. You can go elaborate or simple, all homemade, all store bought or a little of each. The mostly store bought or “left over” option can be done in less than 10 minutes!

imageThe trifle I made is layered with homemade whipped cream, Smucker’s Decadent Hot Fudge, Smucker’s Sea-salted Caramel, broken up brownies and Special K fudge covered pretzels.

You can use angel food cake, pound cake, devils food cake or any sturdy cake that can be cubed or broken without being all crumbles OR use your favorite Jell-O flavor made with the Jiggler recipe. Add some fruit or candy pieces or even pudding!! Drizzle on your favorite sauce toppings, add in some homemade whipped cream or Cool Whip and you have a stunning looking, mouth watering, crowd pleasing dessert.

The possibilities are endless and time is precious. Don’t fret when you forget you said you’d bring a dish to a potluck event or your kids class for a party. This dish will look like you slaved over it – even though you didn’t!! The crowd will love it and you didn’t have to break the bank or a sweat to make it; a win-win in my book. ENJOY!

Am I the only one?

~ Laura ~ 1 Comment

IMG_0963Peanut butter + Chocolate = LOVE for most people, but I am not one of them. I would much rather drag my celery sticks through thick and gooey creamy peanut butter or slather on some chunky peanut butter and raspberry jam onto toast for a great throw back sandwich.  Whenever I think of peanut butter cups I think of my brother, who is a peanut butter and chocolate lover, and “50 First Dates” with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore. “Want me to put some peanut butter cups in your eggs?” – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4quLuThn_Sc I had intended to make these awhile back for a friend and his tattoo shop. They were doing a great donation night for Project Semicolon. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to go and support this great endeavor due to previous obligations with my children, but I was there in spirit (and still owe Sam some goodies!).

(null)Since I was going to be making quite a few of these in not a lot of time, I had bought pre-made chocolate shell cups. I do have a candy mold to make these by hand, but this was way simpler for the time I was going to have to make them. I bought three packages (about $4 each at Walmart) of ChocoMaker dessert cups. These cups come in two trays of six and unwrapped. There is no need to peel anything off these delicious Dark Belgian Chocolate cups. To make these from scratch you would  need a mold and tempered chocolate. These cups are so versatile. You can fill them with any type of ganache or cream, the possibilities are ENDLESS!

IMG_0957I made up a triple batch of chocolate ganache (ensuring I would have some leftover to make some goodies that I do like!). Ganache is so easy to make. It is my go-to filling for cupcakes and cakes. If you leave it out at room temp. it will set and can be used for a rich and decadent frosting. For a single batch of ganache you will need 1/2 cup heavy cream and 8 oz. of good chocolate chips – I used dark, and a pinch of salt and a tsp. of instant coffee granules.

 

IMG_0958Keep in mind, dark chocolate is easiest to make into a ganache and white chocolate is the hardest. I put all my ingredients into a pan and and stirred constantly until it was smooth, creamy and combined. Don’t let this mixture stand or it will burn; you need to keep stirring it. You can do this in a microwave by combining all the ingredients in a microwave safe bowl and heating in 30 sec. intervals and stirring throughly between each heating session.

IMG_0960After ganache was made, I set it aside off the stove to set slightly before using as my peanut butter cup topping. For the centers I used double batch of filling. For a single batch you will need 1 c. creamy peanut butter, ¼ c.unsalted butter, ¼ c. light brown sugar and 1¼ c. powdered sugar. In a medium saucepan over med. heat, combine peanut butter, butter and brown sugar. Heat until completely melted, stirring constantly. Pour mixture into a mixing bowl and add powdered sugar a little at a time. Mix on low until it is complete incorporated. Set aside and let cool slightly. I put this mixture into a disposable piping bag, which makes the process much cleaner and easier. Once the mixture is cooled, pipe into shells. You will need to flatten the top slightly and push it into any open gaps. IMG_0961IMG_0962

Then spoon on the ganache and smooth it out for a delicious and indulgent treat! P.S. – You might want a glass of milk – just sayin’! ENJOY!IMG_0963

 

Truth, Stigma and Healing

~ Laura ~ 1 Comment
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Photo: Valerie McKeehan

This blog is part of my path to health. I am a hot mess – aren’t we all?  I finally realized at 33 that I am not capable of changing how I handle and/or manage my stress. I have always been hard on myself … ALWAYS. Let’s be real, it needs to stop or I will end up teaching my daughters this bad habit.

I am use to dealing with a million things at once; I am a mom of two, best friend to their dad, who owns his own business, and my job requires me to multi-task in several departments. I have stress on a daily basis. We all have our laundry list of daily responsibilities. I always thought I was good at dealing with stress – I honestly thought this with all of my being.

Then it happened. I had a “melt down.” I was sitting at my desk at work tearing up over something I knew wasn’t my fault. I had been snapped at by someone else (who was obviously stressed out also). I was absolutely dumb-founded. I kept replaying the scene over and over and over in my head. What could I have differently? How did I not know ahead of time this would happen? I shouldn’t have said anything. I am so stupid. And around and around it went. I felt like I was vibrating in my own skin. My ears were pounding and I shaking, I felt like the room was closing in on me and I couldn’t breathe. I know now I was the proud owner of my first panic attack.

I called my doctor’s office and they fit me in the next morning. I was nervous at first. I remember thinking geesh, another ailment. Lets add to the list. I wasn’t ashamed to talk to my doctor about my feelings – he is an amazing doctor. He goes out of his way to help me when it comes to thinking outside of the box in regards to not being able to take any kind of pain medicine. The first thing his medical assistant said to me is “Just breathe, it gets better from here.” Wow! So simple and yet so powerful for me.

I have a hard time releasing control. I am in the school of thought that if you want something done right, do it yourself. Sitting in that room, then and there, many memories flooded back to me of times where I chastised myself over and over for something that went wrong – where I felt I had disappointed someone. I knew in that moment I need to let go and let someone else (my doctor) be in charge.

Fast forward to today. People are noticing a difference. My daughters notice a difference. I notice a difference. There is no shame in needing help, regardless of what it is for, and asking for help is truly the first step – AND IT IS A HUGE ONE! Knowing there is a light at the end of a dark tunnel, happiness and smiling is possible, this is relief that you don’t understand until you have been the opposite. I took what my doctor told me to heart and really listened to what he had to say. “There are three types of people with anxiety and depression that receive medicine to help them. One is someone who takes medicine for a time and gets to a point they don’t need it anymore, kind of like a reset. Two is someone who takes medicine for a time, then goes off of it for a time, then back on for a time, and so on. Three is someone who takes medicine for the rest of their life. Is there a right or wrong way to do this? No. Everyone is different and that means their needs are different. Should you try to define yourself as one of the three? No. Just know that whichever third you happen to be, there are others, and that you are trying your best to help yourself into the light.” So I have chosen to breathe, take time each week for myself and not feel guilty, and do what I do best and love … bake.

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies
Ingredients:
2 1/2 c. AP flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. pumpkin pie spice
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 c. unsalted butter, softened
1 1/2 c. granulated sugar
1 c. canned pumpkin puree
1 lg. egg
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1 bag semi-sweet or milk chocolate chips

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, pumpkin pie spice and salt; set aside. In a med. bowl cream together the butter and sugar. Add pumpkin, egg and vanilla to butter mixture, and beat until creamy. Mix in dry ingredients. Add in chips and stir gently to combined. Drop onto parchment lined cookie sheet (I use a 2 tbsp. cookie scoop). Bake for 15 to 20 mins. in preheated oven.

Turn these into whoopie pies! You can make a simple cream cheese or buttercream frosting, or your favorite whoopie pie filling, and you have a double duty recipe!

Look for the signs!

~ Laura ~ 1 Comment

I am a firm believer of everything happens for a reason and there is no such thing as a coincidence. There are little signs everywhere (each and every day) that sometimes we see and most of the times we don’t. Then out of left field (at least that’s how most of us feel … right?) this huge sign drops out of nowhere and hits us like a ton of bricks. What’s the saying? Hindsight is 20/20? Looking back we can somehow connect all the little signs that lead up to these huge events, but we often aren’t seeing them in the moment.

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My loves on their first day of school! 2nd and 6th grade.

I had every intention last night to race through the evening to get everything done so that when my girls came home from karate and soccer I could hear all about their first day of school with all my attention just on them. Daddy was picking them up and I was cooking dinner, I had it all mapped out in my head. I had decided that while the chicken was cooking I would make a box of brownies and doctor them up with an amazing topping – quick and easy, and a blog post entry. Only as I was reaching for the measuring cup to add my water to the bowl that already contained the eggs, oil and bag of mix … it fell into the sink full of soapy water. GAH! There is no coming back from that. You can’t discretely fix that mistake! So, I cleaned up my mess and thought, well it just wasn’t in the cards to make this box of brownies tonight. I finished making supper and had great stories to listen to while we ate dinner as a family after their first day of school, and I was thankful.

IMG_0884Later on that evening, I decided that I needed to unwind and clear my head. For me baking is my zen, I get in a mindless groove and create scrumptious goodies for others. Bringing a smile to someones face and knowing that even if for only a few moments they get to forget about what ails them, then my job is done. I took out my trusty Betty Crocker’s Cookbook from the 70s (?) and dug out her brownie recipe. I figured if I had all the ingredients to make brownies from scratch then that is why my bowl of mix dumped. That was my sign. As I have said before, if you have quality pre-made items, USE THEM! Don’t feel like you HAVE to do everything homemade … just make sure it’s made with LOVE.

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Betty Crocker’s Recipe

Brownie Ingredients:
4 oz. unsweetened chocolate
1/2 c. shortening
2 c. sugar
4 eggs
1 tsp. almond extract
1 1/4 c. AP flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
Directions:
Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease 13 x 9 pan. Melt chocolate and shortening in a small pan on the stove over low heat. Stir constantly. Remove pan and pour mixture into a large bowl. Add in sugar, eggs and almond extract. Blend together until eggs and sugar are combined. Add in remaining ingredients and stir until just combined. Pour into prepared pan. Bake about 30 mins. or until batter has just left the sides of the pan and the top is dull looking. Do not over bake.

IMG_0885Digging through the cupboards I found I only had two cubes of unsweetened chocolate, but never fear, good ol’ Betty has the answer to everything! I just used the additional quantity in unsweetened cocoa powder and shortening – voila, problem solved.  So I whipped up a batch of Betty’s brownies with a small tweek. I used almond extract instead of pure vanilla as I was making an Almond Joy topping for my brownies! Once the brownies were cooked and cooling I started on the yummy topping!

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IMG_0889In a medium bowl I mixed 2 cups of shredded sweetened coconut, 1 cup of almonds, 1 cup of mini chocolate chips and 1 can of sweetened condensed milk. Can we just take a moment to relish in how amazing sweetened condensed milk is? There are two things that come from cans that I can lick the spoon after … sweetened condensed milk and tomato paste (weird … I know). Once it is all mixed, try not eat it all before you spread this gooey deliciousness onto the brownies!IMG_0890

IMG_0891You can cheat and not wait for the brownies to cool before spreading this on top, but be sure to remember that the mixture is thick and spreads rough. Then just stick them in the fridge (so the chips don’t melt) to cool. These are sinfully rich. I was able to cut mine into 32 squares easily. ENJOY!

 

Memories

~ Laura ~ Leave a comment
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Me and my daddy

I love having deja vu! It is a sometimes frustrating event – trying to figure out when this moment in time happened the first time. Usually, however, I love the thought that this moment was so great the first time that I get to relive it a SECOND TIME, or that possibly I missed something important the first time so I get a chance to catch it the second time around.  Anything can trigger these moments – a song, a word, a smell, a feel … something so small can bring back such HUGE emotions and feelings of a time before.

Reliving moments in my life can sometimes be bitter-sweet, like losing my dad when he was only 34 and I was only 6. I think of him daily without fail, though sometimes it is because I will hear a song or smell something and I am taken back in time – back to the few years that I had with him. I often wonder what life would be like if he were still alive – how different things would be. I know that even though he is not physically here with me he is watching over me and my girls, and that he hasn’t missed a moment.

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Brown Sugar Chocolate Chip Cookies

Food has always had a way of transporting me to another time and place, invoking memories of delicious dishes I have eaten or the people who have made them. My mom always made what I now know are called Peanut Butter Blossom Cookies (us kids just called them peanut butter kiss cookies). For the longest time I thought Hershey Kisses only came out around Christmastime, because that is when she made them. My Grama Berta always made celery stuffed with cheese for the holidays and family dinners, and my brothers and I still look for it on the table at holidays. My Grama (my mom’s mom) always makes broccoli casserole, which I love and still request. My girls always ask their Grammy to make sweet potato souffle for holiday dinners, and with me it’s my Brown Sugar Chocolate Chip Cookies.

When people speak of traditions in their families, I think many times we don’t include the food that is made. Whatever the reason for coming together – a holiday, a wedding, a death, a birthday – we include food. Some of these dishes are passed down from generation to generation – a near and dear family recipe, or something we stumbled across or made on a whim and fell in love with. The food we make will help create memories for the ones we love and bring them back in time, reliving memories, keeping traditions alive and sometimes even creating some new ones.

Downeast Delicacy

~ Laura ~ 1 Comment

IMG_0834Blueberries are bountiful in Maine, especially Downeast. When I travel home down on Route 9, I am constantly in awe with the beauty of the blueberry barrens. With the last of my fresh blueberries from the Route 9 area I made an open face pie and treated my co-workers to some sweet semi-homemade deliciousness.

Semi-homemade you say? YES! There is only one area in life that I condone, and sometimes even encourage, cheating! That is when it comes to the kitchen. There is no shame in utilizing a quality pre-made product. I am a mom of two girls, I work full time, the girls have karate 2-3 times per week … the list goes on and on. Doesn’t it for everyone? I don’t always have time to knock out a pie crust or batch of brownies, but I will spruce it up and make it my own by adding homemade components.

I hear over and over again how people don’t have time to bake. I get that andIMG_0829 fully understand it. I think with baking people feel it’s not okay to use a pre-made pie crust or a box of brownie or cake mix, but we don’t always have this mind set with cooking. Sometimes I want an easier and sometimes faster way to make something yummy. I have NO SHAME in this EVER!

Pie Crust:
IMG_0830Use your favorite recipe or use store bought. Make sure to blind bake your crust. Once I line my pie plate with the crust and crimp the edges, I line my pie with parchment paper and fill it with beans (that I re-use) to weight the crust down. This ensures that the crust doesn’t shrink down the sides of the pie plate and keeps it from bubbling up all around, since I don’t want to prick the bottom of the crust.

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I bake the pie crust following the directions on the box for the oven temp., however, I rarely use a timer. Once I start smelling the heavenly scent of toasted butter, I know my crust is just about ready! While the crust is baking, I prepare my filling.

 

Pie Filling Ingredients:
You can substitute any frozen or fresh berry for this type of open-face pie.
2/3 cup sugar
1/4 cup cornstarch
1/2 cup water
Zest of one lemon
1/4 cup lemon juice
3 cups blueberries

IMG_0833In a large saucepan, combine the sugar, cornstarch, water and lemon zest and juice until smooth. Add blueberries and stir gently. Bring mixture to a boil over medium heat. Cook and stir until it has thickened. It should coat the back of a spoon, and you should be able to run your finger through the mixture and have the line stay. (CAREFUL, mixture will be HOT). Once the pie crust is baked add this mixture slowly and gently into it. Let pie cool before serving.

IMG_0835I added homemade whipped cream to this pie just before serving. I hope you enjoy this pie as much as my co-workers did. It was gone shortly after it was brought in! (Note the pie plate is for a cherry pie – oh well!)

 

 

Summer + Maine = Blueberries

~ Laura ~ Leave a comment
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Blueberry Coffee Cake

A friend gave me some Wild Maine Blueberries – 4 pints to be exact. I knew right away that I would make PIE, but I also LOVE coffee cake. If done right, it is tender and moist, and mouthwateringly delicious. So, I started looking online for a good recipe and decided to try out Ree Drummond’s Blueberry Coffee Cake (Original recipe: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/ree-drummond/blueberry-coffee-cake.html). I have to say, I normally default to someone on the Food Network and/or Cooking Channel;  I could watch the Food Network and Cooking channels all day long if I left myself.

I find the more simple the ingredients the better the taste, and it is always easier to make something if I don’t have to run out and buy special ingredients. I laugh often when a friend will ask me for a recipe and I start the answer with, “It’s so easy … ” They never believe me, but it’s true. If a recipe is too complicated and takes a ton of time to make, I won’t make it. The truth is I just don’t have time, not that it isn’t a recipe worth making or won’t taste amazing, but I just don’t have time. I usually bake late at night after everyone has gone to bed and it is just me and my mixer. Many sleepless nights are filled with heavenly aromas, beaters for licking and treats for my family, co-workers and friends.

This recipe had ingredients I already had on hand (thanks to my friend I even had FRESH blueberries) so it was a no brainer. This recipe will definitely get added to my stash at home, as my daughters were begging for seconds!

Ingredients List for Cake:
5 tbsps. unsalted butter, softened – Ree’s recipe calls for salted butter
2 c. AP flour
2 heaping tsps. baking powder
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. salt
3/4 c. granulated sugar
1 lg. egg
1/2 tsp. vanilla extract – high quality if possible, it really does make a difference
3/4 c. milk – I used skim
2 c. fresh blueberries

Ingredients List for Topping:
1/2 c. AP flour
1/2 c. granulated sugar
6 tbsp. unsalted butter – Ree’s recipe calls for salted butter
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 tsp. salt
Granulated sugar, for sprinkling

Directions for the cake: Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 9 x 13 in. baking pan with butter or shortening. Add flour, baking powder, cinnamon & salt to a medium bowl & stir to combine. Set aside. Cream together butter & sugar with an electric mixer. Add egg & vanilla; mix until just combined. Add dry mixture that you set aside & milk, alternating, & mix until totally incorporated. DO NOT OVER BEAT or your coffee cake won’t be crumbly and tender. Stir in the blueberries until evenly distributed. Pour batter into prepared pan and gently smooth out to reach sides of pan.

Directions for the topping: Combine flour, sugar, butter, cinnamon & salt in a medium bowl & cut together using a pastry cutter. I used my fingers to combined, which gave me a smaller crumb topping. Sprinkle over the top of the batter.

Bake 40-45 mins. or until cake is golden brown. Often oven temps. and times will vary, so I suggest using the light in your oven to check on the coffee cake around 30-35 minutes. Sprinkle with sugar and ENJOY!